Just tired of it all....

No, I haven't been posting the past few days. Even my therapist got upset at me because I've not been writing.

When you're in a funk, you can't write. You can't do anything but sit and spin your wheels which just causes more frustration over how you're not going anywhere in your life.

I can end up waiting up to six months for someone to do something about my ERO/EEOC claim because that's the law. Even though I now can't work doing the job I had because some idiot decided he wanted to make the rules instead of following the law, I have to wait for the legal process to take its course.

I've applied for so many jobs in the local area I've completely lost count. And have I heard anything back? Nope. Or when I go somewhere thinking I might like to apply and I can already see in their faces the fact that they're not thrilled over my 86-pound constant companion, I don't bother. Besides, I'd rather have her with me everyday than the crap that can happen at most places.

Got news about a family member who's going through some tough times. I want to be able to help and give support but I also don't want to be intrusive. I remember when I was in a somewhat similar situation and the last thing I wanted was pity from anyone and I usually got a lot of unsolicited advice that didn't do me much good. I don't want to be one of those kinds of people.

One of my friends was to get married tomorrow and her fiancé left her today. She and her young daughter who had opened their home and lives to him and his excuse is because his biological son is afraid of having to make new friends when he moves. What a jerk.

I'm trying to help celebrate Youngest Son's upcoming birthday. I went to the movies with Husband, Youngest Son, and four of his friends. They had a great time and I was really glad they could go. I just feel like I wish we could have done more.

Husband and Youngest Son are currently in the basement doing laundry and playing a computer game. I sincerely appreciate that they're doing the laundry because that means I don't have to do it and I don't have to go outside to get to the basement. It's not a "finished" basement like many people have. It has a floor and walls, but there's no way to access it from inside the house. And with the heat the way it is, I'm not in the mood to go outside much.

And, yes, Depressive is trying to get me to post but I'm so sick and tired of being sick and tired that it's just been easier to do nothing and sleep instead of trying to come up with something to write and crying while I feel awful.

Maybe I'll get back on a schedule. Maybe I'll stop writing completely. I've already told my therapist that I'm not writing anymore at the moment about my past because I'm getting to big areas that I don't really remember. There are a lot of blank spaces in my memory -- some last days, some last years -- and whatever is hidden inside them I do not want to bring back to the surface. It wouldn't be healing; it would be reopening the wounds that my brain has found a way to deal with that doesn't cause me any additional damage. I remember trying to deal with them and it didn't work then. Time does not heal all wounds.

Boycotted yesterday and might not post today

Oh....well....yeah.... That is a sort of stupid title since I do have to post something so people can see it.

Doesn't matter. I spent yesterday which, which was Fathers' Day here in America, with Husband and Youngest Son and didn't feel the need to post. Plus, my biological father is a complete and total waste of air that could be used for something productive. Like horrible balloon-animal thingys that clowns make. He's refused to acknowledge that I exist in over 20 years so *pppbbhhhtt* on him!

And today is a slow day at best. I'm not complaining. I could use a nice slow day to be able to relax and think about things that have been and will be happening. Plus, I'm making sure that Youngest Son is completing his chores and assignments as expected. In the past I was always deployed away from home in the summer and he could get away with not doing things because by the time Husband got home from work he'd be too tired to notice something skipped. Youngest Son and I have had a little talk about needing to mature and learning to do things around the house that will help him when he's out on his own in the future.

I might post again tonight and I might not. The voices are arguing over who should write, about what should be written, and whether it's worth writing anything at all now. I have to remind them that this whole thing was their idea so they can't jump-ship on me now. Only six months to go with this project and now they realize it's not as easy as I told them it would be.

And now if you'll excuse me.... I have to dislodge the family cat from the only air duct in the room and she's hogging all of the cool air conditioning. It's hard to write when you're wiping sweat (and cat fur) out of your eyes.

Bloaty ate too much pizza....

I know. It's my own fault. Was planning to cook dinner for the family tonight. But, a tempting email came through the inbox and I just couldn't help myself.

Domino's Pizza offering 50% off any pizza if you order online now through Sunday night.

I remember when Domino's Pizza was called the "Disk of Death" and other not-too-polite names. Domino's was awful. Didn't matter which one you ordered from -- you were guaranteed a round thing resembling a crust with something on the top that you hoped was what you actually ordered, covered in a slime of cheese and floating on what grease hadn't already soaked through the bottom of the box.

Now, however, they've gotten a lot better. And healthier, if you can consider pizza healthy.

So, each of us decided to order a pizza since they were so cheap. Youngest Son got a pepperoni abomination of some sort that could clog your arteries just by looking at the amount of meat and grease on it. Husband made up a pizza he would like to have because nothing on the menu ever totally agrees with his middle-age tummy anymore. And I ordered a Hawaiian pizza because I love ham and pineapple together. We each made sure to get the super-thin crust pizzas so we wouldn't feel nauseated for the next few days. And by each ordering to our own tastes, we could ensure that we got what we wanted. We each got enough of what we wanted and if there was any leftover it could be stored in the refrigerator for lunch tomorrow.

Yeah....right....

Only Youngest Son, who normally scarfs down anything not nailed to the table, didn't finish his. Husband and I both ate ourselves silly and soon realized we had none left for tomorrow. It was good, though. We both were very pleased with our selections and they were well-made and tasted excellent.

It's just now, about five hours after eating it that the bloaty-ness sinks in....or out....or whatever it does. It's hot and humid outside and having not listened to my brain when it was trying to tell me that my stomach might actually have a message for me other than "Aren't you going to eat the rest of that?" is the result I'm suffering now. I don't want to see another pizza for a while. I don't even want to look at the boxes ours came in tonight. They're like little talismans of shame to remind us of our sins.

I think I'll have some milk and go to bed. Maybe I'll wake up and it's all a bad dream. Or, more likely, I'll have pizza-dreams all night (the really weird ones about which every therapist hopes to sell a best-selling book) and wake up even hungrier than usual in the morning.

"Dallas" is still dull as dishwater....

Oh, the 1980s. When not everyone could have cable television and even if you did, you didn't have 800+ channels of crap from which to choose your evening's entertainment. Back then, people actually made plans around their favorite television shows. Well, unless they were wealthy enough to own a VHS or BETA video recording machine to record a show for them, commercials and all. No DVRs. No commercial skips. Watch it when it airs or wait until rerun season and hope the episode you missed is there.

I had to explain all of that to Youngest Son tonight as Husband sat on the couch (and for over an hour did NOT fall asleep!) and watched the new series of Dallas on TNT. He was a big fan of the show back in the 1980s and wanted to see how stupid....I mean....good the modernized show would be. Of course, when you get the old actors on there playing their old roles, you can't help but remember what the show used to be and wonder if they can actually get it to be that good (or bad) again.

Now, I didn't watch Dallas when it was on in the 1980s. The only episodes I ever watched were when J.R. was shot (because, who didn't watch that one?) and the one when Southfork burned. That episode I was somewhat sort-of forced to watch because I was at a sleepover at a friend's house and all of the other girls loved Dallas but I had no idea who anyone was other than J.R. and Bobby. Oh, and I did see the episode when Bobby comes back in the shower -- but that was a rerun many, many years after it originally aired.

So, I'm watching the show with Husband and it's as goofy as ever. Youngest Son asked, "Is this a male soap opera?"

Yes, Son. Yes it is.

Nighttime soap operas like Dallas, Dynasty, and Falcon Crest were heavily watched by women but they were designed to get the men-folk into the sittin' room to watch as well. They weren't as silly as the daytime soaps, but you still knew that every scene had to have someone looking off into the distance as if they're thinking, "Did that cat pee in the litterbox?" (it's an acting trick) while the camera either gets closer or pulls back before the scene changes. Or before a commercial came on. Or before another ad for the same show you were watching came on to preview the next week's episode. As if you'd miss it....

So, yeah, I'm not particularly thrilled with the new version of the old show. I liked how they tried to keep the intro credits the same with the music and scenes of Dallas (Texas). But, a neat intro does not a great show make. I might give it a few more episodes before I totally write it off as a bad job. Seeing Larry Hagman and Patrick Duffy talking about what Miss Ellie did or didn't want with her will is still interesting. Goofy, but interesting.

Almost missed today

Got up at 5 a.m. to take my medication as usual. Felt really sleepy and did doze for a few moments on the loveseat. Made the decision to go back to bed after Husband and Youngest Son had gotten up and started preparing to go out to yard sales and a big storage unit auction.

Slept until noon. Not incredibly unusual when I'm not feeling well and didn't go to bed on time the night before. Stayed up late with Husband watching silly movies and talking. It was worth it.

Ate a little lunch and was convinced by Husband and Youngest Son to go back to bed because I was feeling tired. Did so and said I'd sleep for about an hour.

It's now 6:30 p.m. and I'm finally awake. What the hell happened to me? I don't feel outrageously ill. A little warm but that could just be my own personal global warming at work, too.

Glad I woke myself up 'cause the other two would have let me keep sleeping. I know they mean well but if I sleep too much in the daytime I can't sleep during the night and then I get my days and nights mixed up, just like a baby can. And it happens too easily because of my medication, too. I don't need that right now.

So, I hope nothing really earth-shattering happened today because I completely missed it. And my brain and eyes are already telling me I should be back in bed.

*Yawn* Maybe tomorrow's post will be worth reading....

7 Ps Rule needs to include "Patience"

You know the 7 Ps Rule, right? If you were in the military, I'm fairly certain that you've heard it multiple times. If you teach school, you most likely had to memorize it during your Master's degree classes (except they usually did the 6 Ps to omit the one "questionable" word). And if you ever need to remember how to prepare for something, it's one of the best rules to keep in mind.

Proper Prior Planning Prevents Piss-Poor Performance.

Yes, I know there are many different variants on this mnemonic device. But, this is the one I learned first both from sitting through graduate-level courses when my parents were getting their Master's/Specialist's in Education degrees and by having military members in my family. Over the years, it's served me well.

However, today Youngest Son needs to add the word "Patience." More grammatically correct, it should be "Patient" as in "Patient Proper Planning Prevents Poor Performance" (deleted the objectionable word since he's still not allowed to swear). In a few weeks he'll be celebrating his birthday and we've agreed to allow him to invite over his closest friends for a pizza party and then for them to go to the movies that evening. The female guests will have to be picked up by their parents after the movie while the male guests can come to our house for a sleepover. He's been texting all of his friends today and bugging me for specific details, such as start time, menu, etc.

He's forgotten that his father and I have not finalized any plans. He's also forgotten that he's still grounded at the moment and if he doesn't earn his privileges back in time there won't be a birthday party. His friends are all trying to arrange their schedules and make suggestions for things to do and ingredients for the pizzas but we don't have anything confirmed at the moment. Big shock for him and his buddies if it's all for nothing!

I admire his desire to be sure to plan early enough in advance so that all of his friends have the opportunity to check with their parents/families to ensure if they'd be able to attend. I'm just not happy that he's getting their expectations up for something that may or may not happen. Plus, the parents also won't be very happy if they change their schedules around to accommodate something that isn't happening.

Oh well. Not much I can do about it at the moment. I told him to be sure to let everyone know that nothing has been confirmed yet and that he's just checking to see if they would be able to attend. That way, we can also plan for how much food and how many tickets we'll need to buy.

We'll see what happens.

Feeling down and inadequate....

It's my pity-party and I'll whine if I want.

Youngest Son announced that he just heard one of his best friends is traveling to London (UK) for an international choir event. I'm proud of his friend and am happy for his family who will also be able to travel with him. I was in London in 1994 during college and loved it. I really, really want to go there again.

And every year when I've been working and paying-off bills, I've been trying to save the money so that I can take my family there. Or, if not able to take everyone, at least take Husband with me because it was while I was there when I realized how much in love with him I was (and still am) and I want to share with him the places I went and where I missed him so much. But usually I'd work myself silly and end up sick in the hospital or so sick I'd have to leave and then all the medical bills needed to be paid. Now that my former employer has taken my career away from me and people aren't very thrilled about hiring someone who has an 85-pound dog in constant tow, I don't know when I'll ever get to take them.

Youngest Son hasn't said that he's jealous of his friend, but I know that he's disappointed because I still can't take him there. I've been saying for years that I want him to experience another country and all of the history that can be found. And Eldest Son has wanted to go to London for a long time as well since his biological father and step-mother traveled there but didn't take him. I've felt like I should make that up to him. Maybe I'm irrational about it. But I'd still like to give my kids and husband an experience they will remember forever and am just feeling awful that I've worked over the past eight years to do that and still haven't been able.

Going to go watch a musical on television. Maybe I'll feel better. Maybe not. Just don't be surprised if I'm still pouting for a little while.

A nice, uneventful day

Today I'm very thankful for a day without too much happening. It's been very stressful since this time last week and I'd like for the stress to remain at bay.

Of course, I have my appointment with my therapist tomorrow, so we'll have to see how that goes. And I've got more questions to answer in regards to my ERO case that I've filed.

Hopefully Youngest Son will have learned a little something over the past week so that I can maybe give him a privilege back. Never give it all back at once. I make my kids earn them since they're the one who did something stupid enough to lose it.

So, off early to bed tonight. If we get thunderstorms again like last night, I just hope they don't wake me up again. It was nice to know that it rained last night but I could have waited until the morning to see the wet ground and been just as happy.

Accepting suggestions on "training" a teenager!

Again! I can't believe I have to go through this crap again! The kid is 13 years freakin' old -- how much longer will it last???

I had to go to an appointment today. Usually I can trust Youngest Son to be on his best behavior (or something like it) while I'm out for a little while. I come back and what do I find? I find one of the premiere rules of the house broken and him lying to me about it.

We have a very strict rule about the computer. Because of the questionable content out there and the threat of viruses, worms, and Trojans, we do not allow our children to access the computer unless we're with them or we give them a five-minute window to check email or Facebook. We did it that way with Eldest Son and we're doing it that way with Youngest Son. Even though he has a computer in his room, there is no Internet access to it (not even Wi-Fi) and he's not allowed to turn it on without our permission. I have a special key that allows Internet to be connected if he needs to work on a homework assignment but either Husband or me is in the room with him while he's online. Usually, though, he wants to use our main household computer (from which I also run my online business) because it's newer, faster, and has more programs. Again, though, he must be supervised while using it.

I was gone for an hour and came back to find that not only had he been on the computer when I was gone and without permission, he'd also accessed the Internet and even looked into the history folder for our web browser. That threw up red flags all over the place because he could have been to a site we don't allow and deleted the information. So, I asked him what happened while I was gone.

Nothing. He gave me the standard teenager shrug of the shoulders and a monotone "I don't know" as an answer. I started listing the items he has privileges to use and/or owns and which ones he would be losing as he continued to feign an inability to recall anything he may or may not have done over the hour that I was away from home. Finally he said he looked at the history to see if we had bought him a birthday present online.

He must think I have "stupid" written on my face because I don't believe that for a moment. And I told him that as well. His birthday is over a month away and I certainly wouldn't purchase anything this far in advance, mostly because I never know when he's going to pull a stunt like this and end up grounded again.

A couple of years ago he took something of mine and lied about it. I could prove that he did it and even showed him the evidence. He continued to lie and for over half and hour he lied and lied until he realized that he was just digging himself a deeper hole of punishments. And every time he continued to lie or did something else against the rules, we just added the time for that infraction onto what he'd already earned. The kid was grounded for about six months! You'd think he'd have figured it out by now that we, his parents, are much smarter than he is and will find out when he does something wrong (especially since he's not good at covering his tracks) and that just admitting to what he did and apologizing would get him in far less trouble than lying about it.

I don't know what to do. Seriously. This keeps happening over and over and over and I'm sick to death of it. Right now his "privileges" are to eat, sleep, use the bathroom, do his household and yard chores, and practice his trumpet. He can read while he's in his room (he's got LOTS of books on many subjects). But there will be no television, video games, computer, MP3, cell phone, telephone, texting, or going out unless it's to walk the dog or we're all going somewhere together.

This is my first summer home in years. Usually I'm deployed away to work a disaster and I've missed being able to just spend free time with him. No schedules; no worries about work or him having to go to school. He's only been out of school three days and he can't keep it together! I really worry about him in the future.

Stupid clouds....

Today there is to be a solar eclipse. I remember the last one that we could see from this area back in 1994. I was still in college then and there was a big viewing party down by the science building. It was great and everyone enjoyed it.

Now, all of the clouds that were supposed to be around during last week that didn't come all decided to show-up today. I was hoping that Youngest Son would get a chance to see the eclipse since it will be his first.

Then again, when it gets all dim and gloomy outside on a hot day like today, it just makes ya' want to take a nap. Which I've been doing with great success today.

Tired today....

LONG day.... Took Harley to have her yearly "shearing" at the groomer. She grows so much hair during the winter you could almost make enough wigs/toupees for those little hairless dogs. Then they wouldn't get so cold all the time. We also went to our favorite gaming store and sold them a few items for store credit. Just some old books that we didn't like but that their customers will love buying. And the credit can stay there until the next Warhammer 40K tournament or when we need to buy something for someone's birthday, etc.

Also started shopping for a new phone since mine is having battery issues. I first went to a store run by the company with whom I have my service. They said that they don't make stupidphones anymore. I said that I knew he was lying because (1) I'd seen an ad for one and (2) there were some hanging on the wall in the store. He, of course, wanted to show me every smartphone in the place but I told him I wasn't going to pay a bunch more per month for the privilege of having a phone that can do a lot of things I can't afford for it to do nor would I use it for them. I guess I should have also taken a photo (the one "fancy" thing my stupidphone can do) of all of the basic phones we saw at a large electronics retailer in town as well. And if I wanted a smartphone I could get it there for even less than the service company was advertising! But, no, I did not replace my beloved stupidphone.

When Harley's grooming appointment was over, we went to pick her up and I asked the groomer to grind Celeste's nails so that I won't have to clip them for a bit. Celeste was a show dog before she became a service dog but you would have thought that no one had ever touched her feet before when she started trying to escape from the groomer. Fortunately, the lady had a great attitude and just chased her around the grooming table, keeping one paw in her hand at all times, and got it done. Another of the ladies working there asked me if she could know why I have Celeste and when I told her she was thrilled to hear someone else has a service dog for psychiatric issues. I gave her my name and number and the name and number of Celeste's breeder/trainer because the lady and her husband are trying to get a service dog for him to use. I wish them the best of luck because I know that Celeste has helped me more than I could have imagined!

Hopefully tomorrow will be relaxing. I know Husband can use a nice relaxing day after working hard all week. And Youngest Son is now home from school so I'll find plenty of chores/activities for him to complete!

End of the Junior High Era

Today was Youngest Son's last day in junior high. Next year he'll be a freshman. Lord help us all.

I'm incredibly proud of him and am very, very happy that he's had some great experiences and made new friends since we moved to this town three years ago. He's been in three school theatre productions; he's participated in All-District Honors Band (was first-chair trumpet, too); attended the State Band Contest; has made the honor roll; and has a gang of friends that he really enjoys hanging-out with and who enjoy having him with them. As a kid who moved from school-to-school, I know it can be hard to fit-in when you're the new kid on the block. Youngest Son learned a lot more at a faster pace when he was homeschooled, but I agree with him that his past three years in public school have helped him grow in many different ways.

I'm especially proud of him as he has received the President's Education Awards Program Award for Outstanding Academic Excellence. To qualify for it, he had to have a cumulative grade point average of 3.5 or more over his junior high career and test above the average and rank in the top of the State's Assessment Program that's given every year. He received a very nice certificate and a lapel pin that he can put on his jacket when he goes to high school. He pointed out the "autograph" of President Obama on the certificate and I told him that an auto-pen did that. He said he was surprised they just didn't Xerox it and is not impressed by it. He was actually disappointed because he didn't receive a plaque for best brass student in band and was awarded for his academics. I reminded him that it will be his academics that helps him get into the college he wants and will follow him through life. A plaque won by your "nemesis" whose parents can afford for him to take private lessons in order to be better than Youngest Son will only someday be an unwieldy paperweight that your children won't even be able to get rid of in a yard sale.

I think he feels a lot better now. And he enjoyed his last day there. No, he didn't participate with one group that wore the colorful Morph Suits that everyone was buying around Halloween and at least he wasn't dared like one of his other friends to come dressed like a princess today. He made sure he had phone/text numbers for his friends so they can get together over the summer before high school band camp starts in July.

Eldest Son texted me today that he's learned how to weld in his sculpture class in college. I told him I was proud and that the welding experience can also be used in other jobs as well. He hopes to finish his classes soon so that he can graduate in the next semester or two.

One going into high school and one leaving college soon....where does the time go?

Seeing crooked....

Hate it when it's incredibly hot outside. Hate it even more when I don't realize that it's going to be very hot outside and accidentally wear dark-colored clothes which just help absorb the heat that my black car doesn't take from the sun. Fortunately, with Husband driving, I can either crank-up the air conditioning or hang my head out of the window. Celeste doesn't hang her head out the window like other dogs and prefers the air conditioning (and not having to see her "mommy" looking like an idiot).

Today I had to travel across the state again for my eyes. This time I was there for low-vision occupational therapy.

Yeah, I was like you. "How do you do visual occupational therapy?" was the first thing through my head when I heard about it. Actually, they have you try to read a lot of different items in many different sizes, try-out different types of light sources, determine how much functional vision you have, and make more suggestions on how to improve or adapt your current vision to what you need.

Unfortunately, there's not much they can do for me regarding my night blindness and decreased vision when driving. That's just something that I'm going to have to learn to live without even though I prefer being an independent person. Relying on someone to take me places just drives me crazy and I hate having to bum a ride from friends. I'm very thankful that Husband understands what's going on and isn't bothered by taking me places at night (well, not yet at least).

Fortunately with my desktop computer I have a large monitor and it makes it easier to see. When I'm on my laptop, I can increase the print size and make things easier to read. They showed me a special flourescent lamp that has a nice blue-tinted light that is very even and doesn't have a "hot spot" like an old incandescent bulb has. When we tried a regular desk lamp and one of the flourescent lamps, I was able to read much more and even smaller print with the flourescent one. It's not up to 20/20, but it's better. Now I've got to find some to put in the house so that I can enjoy reading my books like I used to. I can still apply for audiobooks through the state's library for the blind, but I hate having to listen to them and not being able to start and stop when I want like I can in a printed book. Some have suggested an E-Reader, but I prefer the feel and smell of a good old-fashioned book.

What surprised me the most today though was how the therapist helped me find a "sweet spot" in my vision. She noticed when I was having difficulty viewing certain items that I would shift it until I could read it more clearly or I would shift my eyes rapidly as if searching for something. I've always had issues with that. I would use my right eye for reading and seeing up close and my left eye for distance viewing. Anything in the middle is a toss-up. The therapist had me look at her face (focusing on the center of her nose) and describe what I could see. I knew she had hair, eyes, a nose, cheekbones, and a mouth. She asked me to describe what I saw and it was all there but blurry. She then pointed at different places along the sides of her face and asked me to focus there and tell her what I saw. There was one place where her eyes disappeared; another where everything was so blurry if I hadn't already seen her I wouldn't be able to tell where some features were.

And then, it happened. She pointed at a spot to the left of her eyes, causing my eyes to shift to the right. Suddenly, not only could I see her face but I could also see the color of her eyes and the darker ring around the outside of her irises which I'd never noticed before. We couldn't pinpoint whether it was my right eye, my left eye, or both working together that made the difference, but just shifting my vision about four inches to the right made things so much better.

She gave me a bunch of worksheets with practice lessons to help train me to look at things "crooked" so that I'm using the "sweet spot" of my vision. She also showed me with a light meter how much I need to be able to see more clearly and we tried different light sources again. The blueish flourescent lamp was the brightest and now I've got to find somewhere that sells them. I want floor models in the living room & bedroom and a desk version I can move about the house and take with me if I'm gone with work or on a trip.

I'll be going back for another session sometime in the near future. I have to look at Youngest Son's schedule for the summer since he wants to get a class out-of-the-way this summer so he won't have to take the class during the school year and free-up a period for something else he wants. But I can tell already that learning to look to the right to see something is a trick that's going to be really hard to teach this old dog to do. Wish me luck!

Day for Mothers brings voices back

I hate holidays. Scratch that. The only holiday I don't really despise is Halloween. All other holidays are over-commercialized. You know that you're going to spend money on costumes, candy, and makeup for Halloween but why does everyone try to guilt us into buying more crap that no one needs just because it's a holiday?

Today is Mothers' Day and it's allowed us (the voices) to move forward and take over the post 'cause even though I have kids, Mothers' Day has always been somewhat annoying. Eldest Son sent a brief text message (just "Happy Mothers' Day). No call or even an email after months of no contact. Youngest Son and Husband though did do a good job at making me feel better though. They allowed me to sleep-in and then made lunch and bought roses for me. Very, very appreciated it was and no overspending. If they're going to overspend I'd prefer that they overspend time with me during the day. It's better than anything they could drag home from a store.

Did call Biological Mother today. Wished her a happy Mothers' Day and received the same in return. Always thought it was strange when she'd wish me a happy Mothers' Day because I'm a mother but I'm not her mother. I think that's just a OCD thing. Husband called his mother to wish her the same today. I have no idea what she had to say because he's the only one who talked to her. She sent me a Mothers' Day card (again, seems silly but that's just me) and a note inside which thanked me for sending articles to her that I didn't send and asking me how I spell my name (by the way, Husband and I have been married almost 17 years now). And when I'm feeling the way I am today (and the voices are more likely to keep redirecting my concentration), it's best I don't talk to too many people.

To "Potter" or to "Potter Squared"

Just returned home from finally being able to see The Avengers. Really enjoyed it, even more than I thought I would. A lot of the "inside" jokes and the two scenes during the credits were very good. Saw the movie in 3D but it really didn't seem to make a difference. Of course, with my poor vision, I'm not surprised.

Now I'm debating with Husband and Youngest Son about what to watch on television tonight. HBO is premiering Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 tonight. I have them all on DVDs and Blu-Ray, but I still love watching the movies (and reading the books).

In honor of the premiere, HBO is showing Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1followed by Part 2 as a sort of "mini-marathon." HBO East is currently showing Part 2 (and I'm watching it as I write) but Youngest Son also wants to watch both which will start in about 20 minutes on HBO West. Husband doesn't want to watch Part 1 but I think he's been outvoted on this adventure.

And I still think Warner Brothers and J.K. Rowling missed the boat when these movies could have been shown back-to-back in the theaters during the release of the 2nd part. I can do 2 in a row, but if they ever try to show all 8, they'll need to provide lots of caffeine and blankets for naps.

Busy! No time! Got to hurry!

Sorry y'all but I'm really busy today. Have eBay auctions that are ending, ones that have ended and paid for that have to be packed for shipping tomorrow, and I've finally heard from the EEO officer and have paperwork to read and sign for him.

Plus I've not been able to get all of my playing with the dogs, television watching, napping, and all-around laying-about done today. Guess I'll do that tonight. Maybe. Or I might just brave the couch and see if it causes me to pass-out like it does the guys.

Gotta be ready for tomorrow -- Youngest Son has his last junior high dance that night. He swears he's not asked anyone to go with him but I think he'll find someone or at least hang-out with "the gang" while he's there.

Happy Birthday Husband!!!

I'm using this post on my blog to wish a very, very happy birthday to Husband. He's 15 years older than me though at times you'd never know it. I think that's one of the things that makes us great together. We're matched both intellectually and psychologically very well (I'll let you guess which one represents whom).

Last year I bought him a rifle. This year I got him a 2-year subscription to a magazine he likes (not adult-only). I told him I felt bad at the difference between the two gifts but that I also blamed him for it because he wouldn't give me any suggestions of what he wanted. He and I both agree that we're getting to the point where we have what we need and just buying something because we want it isn't practical. Youngest Son didn't know what to give him either so he dedicated his last band concert of the year to him.

So, here's to another year of good health and happiness to Husband!!! I love you very, very, very, (continue repeating very ad infinitum) much!!!

Survived another sleepover!

Why is it when Youngest Son has a friend or friends over to spend the night I'm the one completely exhausted the next day? It's not like I'm up watching movies at 2:30 a.m. or trying to finish the last slices of the jalapeno pizza they ordered on a whim!

Fortunately, Youngest Son's friend (to whom he was going to introduce the game Warhammer 40K) enjoyed it very much. I loaned him some of my army since he wants to play the same one I have and he picked up the rules very quickly. They played for over 3 hours and then started another game this morning. We all then went out-of-town to the closest gaming store and Youngest Son's friend had left-over birthday money that he used to purchase some figures so he can start his own army. We even bought him a really cool figure that was already put together and painted that he saw and liked (and it wasn't too expensive) and gave it to him as a belated birthday gift. After having lunch and a running a few more errands, we came back to the house and Youngest Son began teaching his friend how to assemble the figures. They got two done in the short time they had left and they're both looking forward to the time after school gets out for the summer when they can spend more time together assembling, painting, and playing with the figures and ships for their respective armies. I'm very, very thankful Youngest Son has friends here. We were worried that it would be hard for him to make friends since we're "not from 'round here" but he's fitting in with a pretty good group.

Well, this is going to be short 'cause in an hour Syfy is going to be showing the new "Treasure Island" with Eddie Izzard, Elijah Wood and Donald Sutherland. DEFINITELY want to see it!!

Sleepover time again!

Just a quick post 'cause I'm trying to get things ready for tonight/tomorrow. Youngest Son is having a friend over for the evening and to spend the day with tomorrow. He attended his friend's birthday party last weekend and bought him a present that has had the friend fascinated all week.

Husband, Youngest Son, and I enjoy playing the miniatures game Warhammer 4000 (also known as Warhammer 40K). It's a fun strategy/tactics game played with miniature figures and vehicles on a tabletop that you "decorate" with obstacles and terrain to make it look like you're "invading" another world. Husband plays the Space Marines -- humans, and has his battle suits painted with the 35th Infantry Division patch on them. Youngest Son plays the Eldar -- an alien race that is very powerful and has a special character called an Avatar that can basically walk-through the playing area "killing" anything in its path. I play the Tau -- an alien race somewhat based on the Samurai/Bushido code where they believe everything is "for the greater good" and use highly specialized weapons that don't require the soldiers to be close enough for hand-to-hand combat (VERY long-range weapons). Youngest Son's friend was looking at different types of characters and picked the Tau as well. The gift Youngest Son gave him was the Codex for the Tau -- a book published by Games Workshop (the publishers of the game system and who make ginormous sums of money on the expensive figures, paints, books, and accessories to play the game) which explains who the Tau are, what they do, how they fight, what they believe in, and then specifics on each type of character and the weapons, vehicles, and other accessories they can use during the game.

In the game, teams or individual armies face-off on large tabletops and roll dice to determine if they can move and/or attack and must remain in-range of other persons/items/equipment, if required, and everything is based on whatever you roll on the dice required for the type of movement or attack you're attempting and a chart in the book that tells you if you're successful or not. Simple, huh?

Yeah, I'm still trying to learn it all and this game has been out since the 1990s and Husband used to play it a LOT back then. I never got involved with it and probably wouldn't be now except that Husband lucked-out on an entire Tau army with additional personnel, vehicles, and lots of extras that had the whole set been sold at a gaming store or online would have cost over $400, easily. He found it at a thrift shop for $18. For that low of a price, how could I resist? Plus, if I ever get tired of it, I can sell-off the items for the going rate and definitely more than double my money! That is, if Youngest Son doesn't try to get them -- he keeps asking me if I want to trade armies with him. He just doesn't like it because my basic strategic move is to set-up my armies at the far corner of the table and shoot at everyone from there because I have weapons that have a range of 36-inches and most tables aren't that big. That means, almost no matter what I roll, I'll hit them.

So Youngest Son and his friend are going to attempt to play the game tonight since his friend is really, really desperate to see how it all works. I told him I'd loan him a few figures to play with so he can get the idea. Then tomorrow when we go out-of-town to get the huge bags of dog food I need for Celeste and Harley and to take Husband for an early birthday lunch, we're going to swing by the gaming store so that his friend can spend some of his birthday money if he wants to on an army (or parts of one). Then the two boys will be able to play each other at their houses once school is over and might be able to enter some of the tournaments at the gaming store during summer vacation.

I've tied the voices in my head to the back of my skull for the day. I'm not in a manic mode today and I'm holding well on keeping myself out of falling into the depressive side. I'm sure they'll get free and the story will continue again sooner-or-later, but for now I have to decide which figures I'll let the kiddo borrow for the evening. Fortunately, my metal figures (which they no longer make) are really too powerful (and expensive) for a beginner and he can use my plastic figures (which are easy to repair if one should accidentally fall off the table and break).

And, yes, May the 4th be with you!

Stupid not-feeling-well kind of day

I hate it when I wake up to crummy weather. I hate it even more when from out of nowhere I have a sore throat, horrible headache, and crummy weather. Add a low-grade fever and you've got a great snapshot of me today.

I do have to give a big "THANK YOU!" to Husband and Youngest Son for straightening up the house and running errands while I was in my medically-induced semi-coma this morning. Husband and I thought we could stay up late on Friday night like we did when we were younger while Youngest Son was at his friend's sleepover. Both of us are feeling the ill effects of trying to be "young" again today. And, yes, the evil couch has been taking its turns on the guys -- each of them having a moment or two to drift off to sleep. I've been staying on the loveseat but the curse is beginning to spread.

Anyway, EPIX is showing Iron Man 2 at the moment. It will be followed by Thor (which Youngest Son hasn't seen yet) and then the evening will be capped-off by Captain America. Yes, we're getting our Avengers prepping done tonight.

So, back to the living room and my attempts at keeping my own personal global warming in check. It's not terribly warm or humid but I feel like I'm in a sauna. Iced tea, anyone?